So Tired, Tired of Waiting...

You squirm uncomfortably in your chair. Is it getting hot in here? The Muzak is about to drive you over the edge. Oh no, not “Seasons in the Sun” again! The people around you are coughing, sneezing, hacking. Too many bodily fluids, too little space! Your only source of distraction are 30-year-old magazines covered with sinister-looking stains. You cry out in agony: Oh, what have I done to deserve this? No, it’s not Purgatory, silly. It’s just the doctor’s office waiting room. Instead of waiting in misery for your impending doom, make the most of this time. You can actually get a lot accomplished without bosses, spouses or kids interrupting you every five minutes. There’s no end to what you could do! Stuck in Waiting Room Hell with no chance of escape? Try these suggestions to keep your mind occupied. (And off all those germs swarming around you just looking for a way to invade your body.)
1. Meditate
2. Write your memoirs
3. Read “War and Peace”
4. Learn Latin
5. Ponder the meaning of life
6. Balance your checkbook
7. Knit a sweater
8. Read the waiting room magazines to see what life was like at the turn of the century
9. Count the stains on the floor
10. Try to guess what illness the other patients have